Prayer – Live the Crazy Life

Advent, Bible, Christmas, community, Holiday, patience, Prayer, Trust, Trustworthy

The difficult ones

December 17, 2024 1 Comment

It’s the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas. The time when things either slow down as you are wrapping up your year, or speed way up and you are preparing for Christmas and trying to wrap up your year. Either way, it is a weird few weeks of time. So many parties, so much to do, snow and icy roads, the list of things you thought you’d get done this year and didn’t. Ahh the Holiday Season. I am a fickle holiday person. I am either all in and loving it, or I am not into much at all. This year I fall to the latter of those. It’s almost the middle of December and I just have my tree up, no ornaments, no tree skirt, no other decorations other than a few snowmen. I don’t really know why some years I could just skip November and December and jump right into the New Year in January. Sometimes it has to do with relationships. You know the ones that are awkward, or hard, or non-existent that this time of year just somehow seems to highlight.

I was preparing for my Advent study, and we were told to read Romans 15:4-13. This week’s word is Hope. This isn’t the traditional Advent where you look at Love, Hope, Peace, and Joy, but we do have a focus word each week. So, like I said, this week’s word is Hope. And at Christmas time, hope makes me think of the line from Joy to the World that says, “The thrill of hope the weary world rejoices.” Something about that wording gets me every time I hear it. This year, I feel weary for many reasons, mostly because I have been going warp speed, with no slowing down in sight. It’s not been a bad year, but it’s a busy one. And when I am weary, I am not at my best people-wise. I bet you feel the same way. It’s hard to deal with someone who isn’t the easiest person for you to get along with when you’re tired.

We all have people in our lives who, shall we say, test our patience. It might be a family member, a co-worker, a neighbor, your kid’s teacher, or whoever it is, we all have them. When I was reading Romans 4 for my Advent study a portion of that chapter hit me as the key to dealing with the person in your life that needs a little extra grace. Romans 4:5-7 reads, “Now may the God who gives endurance and encouragement grant you to live in harmony with one another, according to Christ Jesus, so that you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ with one mind and one voice. Therefore, accept one another just as Christ has accepted you, to the glory of God.”

That verse has a whole lot going on. When I read it I thought of the person in my life that I have a difficult time with. God has convicted me many times over my negative thinking and judgmental thoughts of this person. I know that it’s ok to not be best friends with everyone, but when it is someone you are around alot, it’s always best if there is peace and not tension. Ok, so the truth is it isn’t about the other person, the one that makes me crazy, it’s about me. There is always going to be people who just rub you the wrong way, but God has a plan to help you get through and it is spelled out in Romans 15:4-7.

I looked into the meaning of a few words from these verses. It says, “Now may the God who gives….” The first thing to do when dealing with someone difficult is to stop doing it on your own. For me, that means praying when I know I am going to be around this person. The next part of the verse tells us what to pray for. Romans 4:5 says it’s God who gives you endurance and encouragement, and He grants you the ability to live in harmony with others. Why does He do this? So God will be glorified. It takes the pressure off to know that it is God’s job to give me endurance and encouragement to live in harmony with others. That is where we start, leaning in to God, trusting Him for endurance and encouragement.

Endurance in this verse means steadfastness, to remain under, to wait, to hope, to expect. It means steadfast endurance, particularly in the face of trials and difficulties, remaining faithful and patient under pressure. Encouragement means calling someone to your side for the purpose of offering comfort. It comes from the same word used in John 14:26 when the Holy Spirit is named the Comforter. Lastly the word harmony means being of the same mind. It often implies a deliberate choice of thought or attitude.

Here is the takeaway. It’s not the person who makes us nuts. It is how we deal with the person that matters. Do we stew over how frustrating they can be? Do we agonize and stress when we know we have to see them? No, we pray and ask God to give us hope that we will find common ground with this person. That the relationship won’t always be strained, awkward, or difficult. We ask God to comfort us when this person hurts our feelings for the thousandth time. We can’t change other people, but we can allow God to change us. So this holiday season, or whenever you are going to be around those people who are difficult for you for whatever reason, remember Romans 15:5-7. Write it down. Keep it somewhere where you can read it, and pray before you are around them.

Let’s choose to accept people for who they are while praying for God to give us endurance, encouragement and the ability to live in harmony with one another. Let’s glorify God in all of relationships – even the difficult ones.

Bible, Jesus, overwhelmed, Prayer, Uncategorized

How you hear and how you read

August 30, 2023 1 Comment

I have been reading in the book of Luke this past week. As I was reading I found myself wondering about so many different verses and their meanings that I started making a list of things to go back and research so I could understand better. One of those things was in verse 18 of chapter 8. But before I go there I have to tell you what happened Sunday on my way to before-service prayer.

I was leading prayer this past Sunday. So as I was getting ready I was asking God what He wanted us to cover in our prayer time. The scripture came to mind about the seed falling on soil and the thorns, or cares of this world, growing up and choking out the word. I felt like God said so many people want a thriving relationship with Me, but the cares of this world keep choking it out. I shared that with the prayer team. They agreed with the feeling of needing to pray over that and we prayed.

Monday morning I was reading in Luke, and low and behold I read chapter 8 which has the parable of the seed tucked into it in verses 5-15. Since the Lord had just been speaking to me about that, I read it slowly a couple of times. The seed in this parable falls onto 3 types of soil and some seed that never even makes it to the soil. The Bible calls that the seed that fell on the road and was trampled on. The soil types are rocky soil where the seed sprouts but can’t grow well because it cannot take root due to the rock. Then there’s the seed that falls on soil with thorns. It grows but becomes choked out by cares and riches and pleasures of life. It does not bear mature fruit, but it does seem to grow some kinds of fruit. Then the last is seed that falls on good soil where it takes root, doesn’t have to compete for nutrients, and it grows and produces fruit.

This is a familiar parable to most of us. The disciples ask Jesus to explain this to them a little more clearly and in verses 11-15 you get the explanation of the soil and the growth of the seed or lack there of. MacLarens Expositions of the Holy Scriptures explains this parable in a wonderful way that makes it clear and easy to understand. The seed sown among the thorns, as Jesus puts it in verse 7, isn’t seed that the sower sowed into a weed-filled field. Rather it looked like good ground, but the ground keeper seemed to have taken short cuts. He cut down the weeds or thorns but didn’t do the hard work of pulling them up before planting. And when the good seed and the weeds both began to grow the farmer let them grow together, skipping the hard work of weed pulling.

I get this. I love to grow a garden, but I HATE to pull weeds. It’s a lot of work, hurts your back, and sometimes you end up pulling up a plant you wanted to grow just to get the stinking weed. It’s often a daily chore and I don’t want to water and weed daily, but I do want the benefit of the vegetable or flowers or fruit in the end. I have found myself taking short cuts in this process. I have even found myself just letting the weeds grow among my plants, to be dealt with at a later day. A good farmer I am not. A patience person I am not either. A daily routine task person – nope not me either. So I really get this. And in the world of my back yard garden, it’s ok. I am not trying to grow enough food to fully feed my family for the year. It’s just something fun, and if it works, bonus! And if it doesn’t, no harm no foul.

But reading verse 14 of Luke 8 tells a different story. Spiritually speaking this is important because if we don’t deal with the weeds (or cares, riches and pleasure of life as Jesus words it) we won’t become mature Christians. We won’t produce mature fruit. We are under ripe and good for nothing. Harsh I know but true. The word “cares” in this verse can be translated “worries” or “anxieties”. You know those feelings of overwhelmingness and the long list of what if’s that we are supposed to cast upon the Lord. Well, left to themselves they will choke out our relationship with God. And the riches and pleasures of this life lead us to depend on ourselves and not God, making idols out of our abilities and making us like the Israelites of the Old Testament.

As true and hard as these verses are, the one that really got me was in verse 18. It reads “So pay attention to how you listen. For whoever has, to him more will be given. And whoever does not have even what he supposes he has will be taken away.” How you listen. Is there more than one way to listen. The word how in this sentence is an adverb; an interrogative particle of manner; in what way?; also as exclamation, how much!

In the Jewish culture to hear is to obey. They go hand in hand. If you don’t obey what was spoken then you didn’t hear to start with. Which is what I think is really happening in parable of the sower, and what the second half of verse 18 is saying. If you don’t listen well or with the intent to obey then you are the one who does not have, but what he thinks he has is taken from him.

MacLaren explains what we are to do with the word and the thorns: “for in every one of us there are the necessary anxieties of life, and every one of us knows that there is real and substantial good to a part of our being, in the possession of a share of this world’s wealth, without which no man can live, and all of us carry natures to which the delights of sense do legitimately and necessarily appeal.

So the soil for the growth of the thorns is always in us all. But what then? Are these things so powerful in our hearts as that they become hindrances to our Christian life? That is the question. The cares and the occupation of mind with, and desire for, the wealth and the pleasures are of God’s appointment. He did not make them thorns, but you and I make them thorns; and the question for us is, has our Christianity driven out the undue regard to this life, regarded in these three aspects – undue in measure or in any other respect, by which they are converted into hindrances that mar our Christian life? Dear brethren, it is not enough to say, ‘I have received the word into my heart.’ There is another question besides that – Has the word received into your heart cast out the thorns? Or are they and the seed growing there side by side? “

What a thought to ponder. What a place to stop and hear what God is saying. It is not wrong to have wealth, or to love your husband and kids, and be concerned for their well-being. But are we letting the word of God affect us in our habits of life. Do I pray when my kids are facing hard situations or simple worry and fret for them? Am I truly trusting God to keep them safe and lead them into the fullness of their personal relationship with Him? Or am I trying to make their walk with the Lord happen in the way I think best and in my own time table. Do I really believe that God will provide for me and my needs, or do I hold too tightly to my paycheck, planning for the worst?

This concept with hearing and obeying carries into how we read the scriptures too. Just a few chapters over from chapter 8, we find an expert in the law asking Jesus about eternal life in Luke 10:25-28. The man asks, “What should I do to gain eternal life?” Jesus answers him with this question, “What has been written in the Torah? How do you read it?” There it is again. The word how. Such a weird word to use in both of these situations. Or is it? Jesus isn’t asking the man do you know what the law says, but do you know how to apply it? It’s the same thing as in pay attention to how you hear. Pay attention to how you read. Are reading looking for loop holes, or ways to justify your actions or cause? Or are you allowing the Living Word of God to penetrate your heart and change you for the better. Are you listening to God and reading His word with the intention of allowing God to change your motives, your desires, your attitude? Or to check off doing devotions on some list in your head making you a good person?

So as you read your Bible and listen to your pastors, parents and other people of authority in your life, and of course Jesus speaking truth over you, pay attention to how you listen to them. Don’t justify or harden yourselves. Listen with the intention to obey, and read with the intention to see the invitation to walk with Jesus – not just follow the rules.

Quote taken from Expositions Of Holy Scripture, Alexander MacLaren, https://biblehub.com/commentaries/maclaren/luke/8.htm, accessed on 8/29/23

Prayer, surrendering, Uncategorized

Learning to sway in the wind

June 6, 2022 No Comments

I had just finished my morning bible reading. Ezekiel 12. I began praying for a friend that they would be sensitive to the Holy Spirit when I looked up from the patio where I was sitting and saw a tall palm tree moving back and forth in the wind. God began to speak to my heart.

This palm tree’s tall trunk is maybe 8-10 inches in diameter, (maybe smaller I am bad with math and guessing dimensions). It’s slightly windy this morning. Nothing major. A nice ocean breeze. As I watched the palm tree move this way and that – unpredictable movements based on the wind – I began to think, “What keeps this tree from toppling over in heavy wind?” Let me explain how tall this palm tree is. I am on the 6th floor of a condo building. This tree’s palms are barely visible to me from where I sit. I would guess the full height of the tree is 8-9 stories tall. This tall skinny tree is swaying gracefully in the breeze.

God said that if I would learn to move with the wind of the Spirit when it starts to blow, the Spirit could keep moving and I would keep swaying with it changing directions when needed, never trying to control the Spirit. Just yielding to its direction.

I have only been in Maui for a few days but I have yet to see a palm tree laying on the ground uprooted because of the wind. I also haven’t seen one broken in two from bending to the wind. What I have seen is trees moving with the wind, swaying and swinging all the while making beautiful soothing sounds with their palms.

It is so peaceful, there is a bird chirping, the sounds of the palms swishing in the air, the sight of all kinds of palm trees dancing with the wind.

My mind began to wonder – what if we all gave up control and just moved with the Wind? What if I learned to live in a peaceful movement with the wind of the Spirit? What would it be like to sway and bend as the Spirt leads instead of fearing that I might bump into this palm tree or that palm tree or worse bend too far and break?

The Holy Spirit is gentle. I know that, yet I forget that. When I feel the Spirit move, I sometimes get tense and worried. What if the Holy Spirit prompts me to do something weird or embarrassing? Yet as I looked out at the palm trees around me the Lord began to show me the beauty I would produce if I yield more to the Holy Spirit, and that I look weird when I fight against the Spirit; not when I move with it.

The swaying of the palm tree is graceful, beautiful and even a little intoxicating. I could sit for hours in this peaceful place listening to the sounds of the wind and seeing the peaceful movement the wind creates.

The Lord began to say “Give up control. Yield to me. Trust my Spirit and move with wind of Heaven, and you too will create a beautiful sound. Others will watch and be in awe of my Spirit in you.’

So today I give back the control I never was meant to have. I yield to the Holy Spirit and commit to a life of swaying in the wind.

Friendship, Jesus, overwhelmed, Prayer, Trust, Trustworthy

Overwhelmed – When the enemy tried to knock me out and God spoke

May 27, 2022 1 Comment

man near carton boxes with many different words about stress

I am sure if you have been a believer for longer than a day you have experienced a season where the enemy seems to hit you out of the blue with spiritual warfare, and then the hits just keep coming from every direction. I don’t like battles. I am not confrontational by nature. I am a people pleaser who easily can put making others happy above my own happiness. I am not a cryer, but lately you’d think I was pregnant the way I cry at EVERYTHING. You get it if you have walked through a season like this in your own life.

It started a little more than 2 weeks ago. An event that shouldn’t have had that much effect on me did. It caught me off guard and sent me into a tale spin. While I was still trying to figure out why I was angry and hurt but this situation, the attacks piled up and took me by complete surprise. After 2 weeks of stress, funerals (yes that is plural), hurt feelings, mental self esteem negative thoughts, PT for a torn ligament in my arm, and fighting with those close to me, I found myself feeling like I was drowning by it all. I began to feel spiritually bi-polar – excitedly “preaching” to my husband one moment, then tearfully exclaiming to him I give up, I throw in the towel, I am done the next. The highs and emotional lows were crazy The tears come easier than I thought was possible.

I read a devotional book personally just for me every morning and every evening. Starting my day with God and ending with God has become a new habit in life this year. On one of the hard days, I was feeling so overwhelmed by, well, everything. Then God stepped in. I cried more but this time not tears of overwhelming hurt and frustration but overwhelming tears of how God was there speaking and loving me. That night I opened my night time devotional book and the title for that day was PERSEVERE. The verse 2 Timothy 4:5 – “Be sober in all things, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry.”

The first sentence from that day’s devotional reads, “Today, persevere. Do not give up, no matter what happens.” I laughed out loud. At my church we are in a series on 2 Timothy. I had been crying out for God to show up, and He did. Just not how I thought He would. I should know by now He never moves how I think He should or will. He didn’t show up and fix the problems although I am believing He will. He came and spoke to my broken heart. He came being more worried about me and the condition of my heart than the chaos around me.

I looked up a few key words from 2 Timothy 4:5. Sober means free from illusions, being tempered and self-controlled, the opposite of irrational. I had been staring at the illusions of the enemy. I had been irrational and definitely wasn’t exercising self-control.

Hardship means enduring painful hardships that SEEM to be a set back but are not. Lastly fulfill your ministry means the use of God’s power bringing the believer to maximum potential, matching their true knowledge of Him.

I finished reading the one page devotional and my spirit shifted. I cried again, but not out of fear; out of knowing God knew how I felt and had been there with me over the last few weeks. I fell asleep in a better frame of mind than I had started the day.

God didn’t stop there. My morning devotional — The same power that resurrected Christ from the dead lives in me. The verse. Romans 8:11. In the devotional she referenced Mark 12:18. The Sadducees were a group of religious leaders during the life of Jesus who were convinced that Jesus’s life ended in a dark tomb and that there was no resurrection. The author says “As I thought how sad it is to see life this way, I sensed the Holy Spirit whisper ‘You have areas in your life where you don’t believe in the resurrection either.” BAM God was opening my eyes and heart to see where my faith was lacking. Again tears of God’s overwhelming love for me.

As if the two devotions were not enough God moved further. Two bloggers I follow posted last night and early this morning, one on don’t give up. The verse “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” (Galatians 6:9, ESV). God was moving telling me He is here. He knows. He cares. He’s not done, so I shouldn’t be either.

Then God got real personal. I have a friend who has hurt my feelings deeply and the worst part is that she is unaware, and I believe at this point she is incapable of seeing or acknowledging this. The other blogger I mentioned posted “How to love well when a friend hurts you”. More tears. God knows. God is here, God cares, God feels my pain, and will move and do what only He can to heal my hurts.

I am so overwhelmed by the God I serve. The only person ever to cause me tears of joy – God.

It’s a tough world right now. Hurt and pain seem to be the normal. Anxiety and stress, being overwhelmed, is just the way life is. That my friend is the lie I had allowed the enemy to convince me was true. It is an illusion. God’s word – “be sober”. God wants me and you to live free from the illusion the enemy creates. God wants me and you to live in full resurrection power. God wants you and me to not give up. God wants you and me to live in unity with other believers. Stop living the illusion and start living the TRUTH. This is a challenge for you and for me. Are you up for it? I am!!

Bible, Jesus, love, Memorizing scripture, Prayer, Steadfast love, Uncategorized

Determined

February 22, 2021 No Comments

Only once before have I come across a word in the Bible that sends me on a wild chase through scripture to understand the word at its core. The first time was steadfast love – hessed. The Lord has given me a new word to study, meditate, search the truest meaning, and then apply to my every day life. Just as understanding hessed at depths I can’t explain I now carry that word along side a new word, sterizo.

I first encountered the word in a Bible study I am doing called Determined – Living like Jesus in Every Moment by Heather M Dixon. It is an in-depth study of the book of Luke, and an amazing one at that. One of the days in the study she leads you to study Luke 9:51 “Now it came to pass, when the time had come for Him to be received up, that He steadfastly set His face to go to Jerusalem.” (NKJV)

Tucked in this verse we find the word that now has grabbed ahold of my heart and has become a tether from my heart to God. It really is the whole phrase “set His face” that means sterizo. It simply means to firmly fix; direct myself towards; give support to secure; to set ones face as flint; a Hebrew expression.

So me being me, I began to study this little Hebrew expression to fully understand. Along the way I unearthed some amazing facts about this expression and learned new things about flint rock. To put all that information in a nutshell, it means to have unwavering determination to accomplish a purpose or a task.

Using Jesus as our Biblical example it meant everything He did from the fall in the garden of Eden to His resurrection from the grave was about getting to the Cross of Calvary. It was always about becoming the sacrificial Lamb of God for you and for me. When He was here on earth He lived with that purpose in mind.

MacLaren’s Exposition’s found on Biblehub.com (https://biblehub.com/commentaries/luke/9-51.htm) explains it this way:

“As we look up at that Cross we know not whether is more wonderfully set forth the pitying love of Christ’s most tender heart, or the majestic energy of Christ’s resolved will. The blended rays pour out, dear brethren, and reach to each of us. Do not look to that great sacrifice with idle wonder. Bend upon it no eye of mere curiosity. Beware of theorising merely about what it reveals and what it does. Turn not away from it carelessly as a twice-told tale. But look, believing that all that divine and human love pours out its treasure upon you, that all that firmness of resolved consecration and willing surrender to the death of the Cross was for you. Look, believing that you had then, and have now, a place in His heart, and in His sacrifice. Look, remembering that it was because He would save you, that Himself He could not save.
And as, from afar, we look on that great sight, let His love melt our hearts to an answering fervour, and His fixed will give us, too, strength to delight in obedience, to set our faces like a flint.”

Charles Spurgeon even wrote a message about this topic that he preached on Nov. 28th, 1880 at the Metropolitan Tabernacle in Newington. His whole message points to lingering with the idea that the Lord loves us so much that He spent decades of time determined to save us from our sins. It’s a long message but well worth the time to read it and ponder his questions in your own heart before the Lord.(https://answersingenesis.org/education/spurgeon-sermons/2738-the-redeemers-face-set-like-a-flint/)

For me, I want to learn to live with my face set as flint towards God every day. Determined to accomplish His purpose each day. Determined to spend time with Him daily. To linger in His presence. To have a heaven-minded agenda for my life lived out each day.

This word sterizo means seeking God daily. Being on purpose in my quiet time to learn His heart, His plan, His love for me all over again. It’s having a resolve to say no to things that are lesser than God’s best for me. It’s having courage to not participate in things that pull me off course from pursuing His heart.

I know it won’t be easy, but I know that with the aid of Holy Spirit and studying Jesus’s determination, I can do it. I can look to others in scripture like David, Daniel, and the apostle Paul who lived this life of a face set like flint on following the Lord.

It will at points be tirelessly hard, but oh so worth it. I wonder who else has a resolve in their heart, and has set their face like flint to follow after the Lord?

For additional scriptures on sterizo read:

Daniel 1:8

Gen 31:21

Deut. 11:18

Daniel 6:14

2 Kings 12:17

Isaiah 50:7

Luke 16:26

Luke 22:32

Romans 1:11

Romans 16:25

1Thessalonians 3:2

1Thessalonians 3:13

2Thessalonians 2:17

2Thessalonians 3:3

James 5:8

1Peter 5:10

2Peter 1:12

Revelation 3:2

New Year Resolution, Prayer

A new year, a new journey

January 4, 2021 2 Comments

The new year, a new beginning, a clean slate. As if all that 2020 brought is just gone and we can move on. Wouldn’t that be great. If 2020 brought us anything, it surely brought anxiety. A year full of unknowns produces anxiety at some level for us all. Some it hit hard, others barely felt it, but it was there – the big WHAT IF……..

What do we do with anxiety? How do we handle our own anxiety and help others process theirs? Me? I lead a couple of Bible studies on the subject. My only way to combat life’s issues is to see what the word of God says about it. The studies were good. I learned a lot. I hope those who joined me in the journey did, too.

And with the start of 2021 I honestly didn’t feel the heavy pull of anxiety that I had last year. It wasn’t even really something I had thought of until I started reading a book about prayer. It’s a challenge really to up your prayer life, stop praying the polite Christian prayers, ‘Lord bless our day, our food, our thoughts, be with us in all ways….’ start praying things like ‘not my will but your will.’ It’s a good book thus far.

Then I read this: ‘Search me, God and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.’ Psalm 139:23-24

It seemed to me to be inviting God to know my anxious thoughts. Inviting God to search them out and reveal them to me for what they are – sin, lack of faith, disconnected from truth. Ouch and wow all at the same time.

When I think of anxiety, verses like 1 Peter 5:7 “cast your anxieties on the Lord”, and Philippians 4:6-8 “be anxious for nothing but in all things pray” jump into my head. But never the idea of letting God examine my heart. More than examine, search it completely.

I am not down-playing anxiety at all. I have experienced it, been controlled by it, and even medicated for it. It’s no joke! And if you don’t know it through experience, then you don’t know. But that being said, my heart is wondering, my brain is swirling. Could there be something to inviting God into knowing, searching, and leading me through my anxiety?

I don’t have answers right now. I just know God is stirring something deep in me. Challenging me, maybe, to trust Him with knowing my anxious thoughts. Knowing deep parts of me I keep hidden from everyone – even myself at times. Maybe He is wanting to lead me to new freedoms that can only be found in the testing of God in my life. One thing I do know. This is where this year starts for me. Where it goes and how it ends I do not know. But I will start with this: God search me and know my heart.

Will you join me on this journey? Ask God to search you and know you. The you He knows may be different than the you that you know. But to be known by God is a good thing. To get deeply personal with God is a great thing. And being led by God, well, it can only lead to personal freedom with Him.

So let’s give it a try. I mean let’s be honest. It can’t be worse than last year, right? And maybe, no probably, no it will be, the best year yet!

Bible, Jesus, Prayer, Trust, Trustworthy, Uncategorized

Jedidiah it’s more than a name!

October 6, 2020 No Comments

As is the case with many of my blogs, this one stems from a Bible study I have been doing called Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen. I highly recommend this study, in case you were wondering.

I have learned a lot over the last 6 weeks in this study, but the big take aways are these: I have a weird mind and thought life, and I think about myself way too much. Much more than I ever realized I did. That realization led me down a new path of unhealthy thoughts. Our minds are so complex.

Have you ever tried to trace your thoughts – where they come from or what makes you think that way, to where a thought is leading? The Bible actually has a lot to say about what we think on and how we use our minds.

Over the past few weeks I have realized I need to reign in my mind. It goes 100 miles a second and it’s all over the place. I do a good job hiding this for the most part, but ask my close friends and husband. I don’t stay focused on one thing for very long. Something I feel the Lord is wanting me to work on – that good old fruit of the Spirit called self-discipline. But that’s a blog for another day. What I want to focus on in this blog is Philippians 4:8, and believing lies versus truth.

In the study Get out of Your Head, the author points out that most lies we believe stem from 1 of 3 categories. I am helpless. I am worthless. I am unlovable.

I struggle with the last two. I used to struggle with all 3, but God helped me get out of the trap of the first. And I believe He’s helping me get out of the last two, as well. Here’s how. When you start believing a lie for truth, you have to go back to when you first started believing it and deal with what happened there that made your thinking go awry. Sometimes that involves repenting, and sometimes it involves forgiving someone, and sometimes you need to do both. In my situation I needed to do both. The repenting part was easy, but the forgiving part? Well that was harder. It involved forgiving myself as well as a few others. Then once you have done that you need to replace that lie with a truth from God’s word. This part sounds easy, and in theory it is. But if you want to 100% believe that truth in your heart and not just in your head, then it takes a work of God.

I struggle with seeing my self-worth. And for many of you reading this who know me you are thinking, “Why would she struggle with that?” Sometimes others see things you never see about yourself, and we are often harder on ourselves than others are or even then God is.

The other day I was praying honestly not about my self worth but about feeling like there is so much in the world that I was bringing to God to fix, heal, change, un-do; the list goes on. Then I stopped and thought, “I want God to do all of this for me, but what does God want me to do for Him?” So I asked Him. And He said, “Look up who Jedidiah is in the Bible.” That might have been one of the strangest things I have had God tell me. But when I looked it up, it changed me forever.

I am sure you are wondering who this Jedidiah is that you probably have never heard of in the Bible, right? Well the answer to that can be found in 2 Samuel 12:25. “…and because the Lord loved him, he sent word through Nathan the prophet to name him Jedidiah.”

Feeling confused right now? So was I until I looked at who God wanted to call Jedidiah and what Jedidiah means. Jedidiah is Solomon. And verse 25 is the only time he is called Jedidiah. That in and of its self isn’t to jaw dropping, is it? But it means “Loved by God.”

Right there in my living room, God told me all He wanted from me was for me to know I am His Jedidiah; that I am loved by the Lord. I just sat there in awe. I had just unloaded a huge list of big issues on the Lord, and all He wanted in return from me was to know He loved me.

I can’t say I am fully over struggling with my self worth. But I have a new truth that no one can take from me. THE LORD HIMSELF TOLD ME I AM LOVED BY HIM!! And if that isn’t enough to stop believing a lie and turn to truth, I found this other little gem in my study today.

We were looking up the original meaning of the words in Philippians 4:8. You know the “think of these things” verse. When I came to lovely, here is what I learned. Lovely in the original language here is “prosphile”, and it means worthy of personal affection, worth the effort to have and to embrace. Once more I heard God whisper, “You were worth the effort to have and to embrace, you are worth my personal affection.” I just sat at my desk stunned, humbled, and feeling special all at the same time.

Will there still be days when I will struggle with my self worth? I am sure of it, but that struggle won’t last but a moment because when the one who is Truthful tells you His truth about you, it changes you into a Jedidiah. And that reality silences any lies about my worth.

So I challenge you. What one of those 3 lies are you stuck in? How did you get stuck there? Once you know that, repent or forgive or do both, and then ask God to whisper His truth to you. Warning. It will change you forever.

Bible, Jesus, love, Parenting, Prayer, Raising Teens, Uncategorized, wisdom

Real change is possible

June 10, 2020 1 Comment

Have you ever had God drop something in your heart that you weren’t sure what to do with? Then you start getting bombarded with others saying the same thing, only in their voice or through their walk with God. Well that’s where I am right now. So I say it is with much thought, prayer and confirmation that I write this blog.

We have been having great, sometimes intense, conversations in our house relating to recent events. We have discussed topics from social justice, to the danger of generalizations and totalitarian statements, to voicing your opinion on how to bring about social change. Parenting teenagers is harder than I ever imagined. It’s hard to parent through these issues because all my children have their own view point and a unique calling from God that brings with it a unique filter in which they view life events. Not to mention I want them to think for themselves, develop their own conviction with the Holy Spirit, and be who God created them to be – no mini-me’s!

All of those discussions, conversations, have me thinking and praying for wisdom, guidance, and how to respond (not to my kids, specifically, but to life events). Then, unbeknownst to them, people around me have been adding to these thoughts and prayers with God. And here is where I land.

Every person is God’s creation. Ephesians 2:10 applies to everyone. And because the creator is so great, everything He creates bears His greatness. Think, the Mona Lisa is famous and has great value because of the one who painted her. That is my base line of truth. If you are a believer I am sure you can agree with me here. Building from that, how can we make that truth not only known but lived out in our homes, communities, cities and nation? This is where I got stuck until I heard from God.

In my Bible study we were asked to read Exodus 2:24-25. “God heard their groaning and He remembered His covenant with Abraham, with Isaac, and with Jacob. So God looked on the Israelites and was concerned about them.”

I am not saying I have a solution but I do have an action to take. God began to stir prayer in me. Specifically this prayer: “God hear the cry of those oppressed and suffering unfairly. God remember you sent your son into the world to reconcile the world back to you, to set the captive free. So God would you please look at my family, my community, my city, my nation, God; and would you become concerned with them?”

I know that prayer alone may seem like a weak stance; however, one of the pastors I work with had an amazing revelation from God on this. She said God told her “There is a Spirit of activation in the air right now. Activation in prayer. Wickedness twists the discernment of activation to activism. We want to see change, want to help, to do something. Activism looks like a lot but accomplishes little; while activation in prayer looks like little but accomplishes much! Do not forsake prayer!” Thank you Amy Martinez for sharing that powerful word.

Slow down read that again. As Christian we are called to act, but wisdom in how we act will be the difference between real change and surface level accommodations.

Prayer is powerful. Pray. Ask God the Almighty to move on behalf of someone or something. Only God can change hearts. So while it is a quiet action, it has a powerful punch. Let’s face it. People are not our enemy here. It is the one who comes only to kill, steal, and destroy. (John 10:10)

I read another blog this morning on this topic and he said:

“I believe God is asking us to look to Him right now, more than anything. It doesn’t mean we ignore issues. No. But unless we drink right now, we will only regurgitate the fear and hysteria of the media that sounds wise but is the twisting tongue of Leviathan which places a veil over those who aren’t discerning it. It’s a call to intimacy and seeking the heart of God when most are wanting to raise their hands to fight.

Nate Johnston Everyday Revivalists
Email: everydayrevivalists@gmail.com
Website: nateandchristy.co
Taken from the Elijah List email distribution.

I want to see things change. I want to live in a place where people are treated with kindness and care. I want to end senseless deaths in America. But I understand I can’t do that in my own strength and power. God is calling us to fight along side Him to bring about a change of hearts and mindsets and bring real justice. Will you join us?

Bible, COVID 19, Memorizing scripture, Prayer, Trust, Trustworthy, Uncategorized, wisdom

Trust God

March 21, 2020 No Comments

Trust God. Simple words to tell a friend or someone you know who is going through something hard in life. Simple to say, especially if things are going well for you at the time.

It seems like right now the whole world is going through a hard time. We are all facing struggles, uncertainty, fear, and probably a host of other emotions depending on how COVID-19 has effected you personally. Even with all of that, my advice to myself, friends, family and my church ladies is to still trust God.

I am preparing to lead a study at my church on Psalm 40. In preparing for it I felt impressed to memorize the whole psalm – all 17 verses. I found myself today stuck on verse 4. Not because I was having trouble memorizing it, but because God was saying “Slow down. Repeat that again. Did you catch what it really said?” Truth was I hadn’t. I had not really let that verse sink into my heart. Verse 4 reads “Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust, who does not look to the proud or those who turn to false gods.”

That one little verse says a ton. First, it’s a choice to trust God. You must make yourself trust God. That means that you have to decide if God is always good. Does He always Love me? Is He faithful? Based on those answers, you can decide either “Yes, He is. So I will make myself trust Him,” or “No, I am not so sure.” I believe the answers to those questions is a resounding YES. So I have decided to trust God when things are good and remind myself I trust God when things are not so good. I teach the ladies in my Bible studies that they have to pre-decide in their hearts that God is trustworthy when things are good so that when the rough time hits, you have a firm answer in your heart. Trust God.

The second part of the verse says not to look to the proud. That means not looking to those who put their trust in their own abilities – those who think they can handle anything. And then, not turning to people who put their trust in false gods. People who trust in money, their status, their minds and so on.

You see right now life doesn’t make senses. Things are weird, it seems no one really knows exactly the best things to be doing. So if we look to family, friends, jobs, government, or even doctors we are putting our trust in the wrong thing. The only one who is ever really in charge, the only one who really knows how things will end and what to do, is God. So why wouldn’t we trust Him?

It is simple to say we trust God but mind-bogglingly hard at times. However, it’s the best choice and full of blessings, absolutely.

So as we walk this COVID-19 thing out, decide right now that God is good and ALWAYS trustworthy. Then when you feel uncertain or that sense of panic rising, remind yourself, “I am one who trusts God. I can remain calm, and pray. He is good. He is with me. He will lead me. I trust God.”

Bible, Prayer, Uncategorized, wisdom

Life Lessons from the Book of Esther

November 10, 2019 No Comments

A while back I posted a blog about what I was learning from studying the book of Esther. Now I am on the last week of studying Esther with a group of amazing women from my church. And while I have learned a lot, the 3 big take-aways are: 1. God uses those in the shadows to affect the outcome of the start (see blog post We all have a part to play). 2. How we approach God in prayer when we are feeling attacked. And 3. the impact of seeing God’s hand in every situation we face.

Since I already explained what I mean by the first take away I will jump straight to the second and third. How we approach God in prayer matters. We can learn a lot on how Esther approached the king with the news that she and her people were set to be destroyed. She asked the king if she had favor in his eyes. We don’t have to do this. We already know we have God’s favor (see Psalm 84:11 or Psalm 5:12 for a couple of examples.) Esther wanted the king to see that he did indeed care for her, that he felt favorable towards her. Once that was established, she used that favor to her advantage. She exposed what the enemy had planned for her. Esther 7:5-6 says “King Xerxes asked Queen Esther, ‘Who is he? Where is the man who has dared to do such a thing?'” Esther said the adversary and the enemy is this vile Haman.” We have a King who favors us, but do we point out to Him in prayer who our enemy is? Do we expose the plans of the enemy to our King? Esther didn’t ask the King, “Please, if it’s in your will can you stop this attack of the enemy?” All she had to do was point it out and then let the King respond. When I am feeling attacked, I ask God to help stop the attack of the enemy. I don’t think that is wrong, but I think there is more power in exposing what the enemy is doing to me and then let the righteous anger of my King respond. The Bible says over and over He hears our cry; He rescues us. (See Psalm 34:17). So why not pray something like this? “God, do you see what the enemy is trying to do to me? The one you favor! Your beloved! How are you going to deal with our enemy?” God is our shield, our protector. We don’t have to ask Him to act on our behalf. We know He will. We just need to let Him know it’s more than we can handle, and we need Him to intervene on our behalf.

The 3rd lesson was pointed out to me in the Beth Moore study on the book Esther. She used original language to point out that the words “portion”, “favor” and “lot” in Esther are all connected in the original Hebrew. In Psalm 16:5, the Bible says, “Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup. You have made my lot secure.” In other words you have given me all things. You keep me secure in the midst of all things. Beth Moore’s words sum it up best – “No matter what life – or Satan himself – hands us, the favor God has on His children causes that “lot” to tumble out on the table in such a way that instead of destruction, the child will discover that her portion turned into destiny one trusting step at a time. When all is said and done, she will see that the portion God assigned her was good. Right. Rich. Full of purpose.” (It’s tough being a woman Bible study page 208)

So when life throws you a curve ball you weren’t expecting, remember God is working all things out for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. – Romans 8:28

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