Live the Crazy Life

Fasting

January 17, 2019 No Comments

The last part of last year was rough. My life was spinning faster than I could keep up with. I was unwilling to deal with emotions in my life, and I found myself in a bad place. I was depressed but unwilling to acknowledge that depression. To be honest it had probably started somewhere over the summer. I just was ignoring the symptoms. I found myself eating Chick-Fil-A and a half-gallon of Birthday Bash ice cream on a weekly basis. I kept telling myself it was ok; I had had a really rough couple of months, and I don’t drink, gamble, or go on shopping binges. And food is a necessity for life. I was out of control. I had no self-control but denied that truth.

Fast forward to a few days before New Years when another pastor at my church approached me and asked if I would be willing to do the Daniel Fast for the first 40 days of the new year. I didn’t want to, but I knew deep in my heart God was already telling me I need to get a grip and gain some self-control. So I agreed. For those of you unfamiliar with the Daniel Fast, it is based on Daniel chapters 1 & 2. Basically Daniel had been taken captive by Babylon. He was being trained in the ways of Babylonian culture, was given a new name, and was given food from the king’s table. The food wasn’t Jewish food, and some of it had been sacrificed to foreign gods. Daniel asked that he and his friends be fed vegetables and water for 10 days. At the end of those 10 days Daniel and his friends looked better in appearance than the men who were given the king’s food. (Daniel 1:15)

The first few days of the fast I was a hot mess. I was mad, emotional, and not fun to be around. It was harder than I thought it would be; after all, this fast wasn’t like the ones I had done in the past where I didn’t eat anything. Let me clarify. I am not the type of person who fasts often. In fact I have only successfully completed two fasts in my 28 year walk with the Lord. I usually have a good reason I can’t participate in fasting. I am hypoglycemic and get migraines when I don’t eat enough.

About the same time I started this fast, I started reading a book by Lysa TerKeurst called Made to Crave. God was speaking “You worship food. You have made food more important than me. You seek comfort in food that only I can give.” When I think of idols, I would never have thought of food. The truth is, food isn’t the real idol here. I am. Maybe I have given my wants and my desires a bigger place in my heart than God. That is a hard thing to come to terms with.

The more I read, and stuck with the fast, and prayed the more I began to see I was living my life the way I thought a “christian” should. I was rationalizing sin, down playing the fact that I had little to no self-control. Eat that cookie – sure. Watch 4 episodes of that TV show – why not? I don’t have anything else to do. All the while I was missing the quiet whispers of the Holy Spirit…. “Enough is enough.” “Have you prayed today more than the simple ‘bless this food’?” The more I gave into my wants, my desires, my self complacencies the quieter the whispers grew.

This fast has been hard, I wont lie. Denying yourself is never easy for a million reasons. Self denial goes against our culture, our flesh, and the enemy hates it to name a few. But as I kept saying “No” to myself the more I began to feel free. I really could eat just a salad and be fine. I could have a bad day and pray and read my Bible instead of watch TV while eating whatever food. I could find self-control with the help of the Lord. I could trust that what I tell others about God is true. He REALLY is our everything. He really does have our best interests in mind. He doesn’t tell us to worship Him alone for his own reasons, but for ours.

I have found that reading my Bible and praying are coming easier in my life. I have found myself longing for time to sit and read or study or pray. The battle isn’t over, but I am winning. I am laying my will down and picking up the will of God. I am hearing the voice of the Lord louder than in the past few months. I am gaining victory and self discipline along the way. I can’t tell you I don’t still want that candy that I got for Christmas that I put in the cabinet until the fast is over. But I can be alone in my kitchen without eating every last piece of it because no one is around to know I ate it ALL.

I am determined that God will be first in my life. I am more in tune to the fact that there will always be a battle for that place in my heart, but for the first time I am willing to fight for it to be given to God.

I want to encourage you that self denial and self discipline are not just good things to do. They are God’s commandments for our lives. 1 Peter 5:8 says “be self-controlled and alert.” Titus 1:7-8 says that as God’s steward we should be self-controlled and disciplined. And 2 Peter 1:3-11 gives a list of the attributes we are to have in our lives that are granted by divine power. That list includes, self-control. Those are just a few scriptures. Not to mention the countless verses about having no idols and making God first.

Fasting is hard, but it has a great purpose in the life of the believer. If you haven’t fasted in a long time (or maybe ever), now is the time. I encourage you to take this to God. Ask Him if there is anything that you put before Him. Then be willing and bold to take that step of faith and fast whatever He shows you until that thing no longer has power over you, and God has His rightful place as LORD of your life.

Bible, Steadfast love, Uncategorized

Hesed – Steadfast Love

December 31, 2018 1 Comment

At the beginning of this year, God gave me the word steadfast love. It was a word that I felt would shape my year. It would be a defining word, one I would study throughout the year in the Bible on my own and write posts with monthly memory verses about steadfast love. While I studied the meaning of Hesed, the Hebrew version of steadfast love, I learned a lot of the character and nature of God wrapped up in this word. But it wasn’t until this morning that I had true understanding of the word.

What started out as a year I thought would be bathed in steadfast love, it quickly turned to heartache and struggle. Early in 2019 I lost a dear friend to a 3 year plus battle with cancer. I had prayed for her and with her, sent her texts often full of words of love and encouragement, only to find myself a few weeks into the year sitting at her funeral. It was rough. I wanted God to heal her, I didn’t want to see her husband and kids go through heartache – all of whom are friends of mine, too. I didn’t want to lose a mentor or a friend. After all this was the year of steadfast love. However, as the year progressed, I was beginning to see less and less love and more confusion, pain, and loss.

The year continued, and it continued to spiral downward. Friends moved away, re-arranging on the staff I work on, more sickness, a dear friend’s mom was diagnosed with cancer of the brain, divorce and addiction also made appearances this year. Not only was there confusion and hurt, but stress and business were added. With the new workings inside our church I had taken on new roles. I found myself at points working 40 hours a week. Something most people do all the time, but for me I hadn’t done that in 19 years. While I was trying to find balance in my life, I was hit with the hardest part of this year. My dad, who has horrible health, fell and broke his hip leading to another surgery. I think this surgery was his 24th or something like that. The surgery itself wasn’t new territory for me, but the outcome was. Three weeks after that surgery my dad passed away. While this was something, given his health, I had been preparing for since I was 8, it hit me a little harder than I thought it would. This year which in January was marked with the steadfast love of God felt like a nightmare that wouldn’t end.

I have so many books I have to read. Some for work, some for study, some personally. I am trying to read a chapter a day to keep up. I sat down this morning with my coffee and opened my book to a chapter I was excited to read. “The power of Hesed.” The book is called the Gospel of Ruth, by Carolyn Custis James. It’s a great book. In fact, it is going to be one of our Bible studies offered this spring. It was in this chapter that God opened my eyes to a part of steadfast love I had failed to see the whole year.

I am not naive. I understand fully that life can be hard for many reasons – sin, a fallen world, the enemy, other people’s sin spilling over on to us, the list goes on. I haven’t ever believed that the hard parts of life are God’s fault, though I do question why He allows things, but I have never blamed Him. I have wondered why steadfast love was the word He gave me to define this year, one that in the physical was marked by loss, pain, hurt, stress, and frustrations.

As I read this chapter I begin to see and understand what God had meant when He told me this year would be marked with steadfast love. The author, Carolyn Custis James explains that Hesed is a word that doesn’t fully translate to english. The best words we have would be steadfast love, loyal love, mercy, kindness, deeds of devotion. She says it is like trying to explain to someone who has seen a llama but never seen a lamb, that they are similar animals. The two have some similarities for sure – the wool-ish fur, both animals graze on grass and live in pastures, but llama’s can tend to be mean, they spit and bite, but a lamb is passive and shows no aggression. Lamb’s don’t fight, they are really helpless animals who depend almost completely on the shepherd. So while in some areas they are the same, their nature isn’t. And while Hesed and steadfast love have some similarities they are not the same. “Hesed is driven, not by duty or legal obligations, but by a bone-deep commitment — a loyal, selfless love that motivates a person to do voluntarily what no one has the right to expect or ask of them. They have the freedom to act or to walk away without the slightest injury to their reputation. Yet they willingly pour themselves out for the good of someone else. It’s actually the kind of the love we find most fully expressed in Jesus. In a nutshell, hesed is the gospel lived out.” (The Gospel of Ruth; page 115)

This year was a year marked by loss and pain for sure, but as I looked back, this year was marked by hesed in action. It has been expressed in praying with my brokenhearted friend, in saying goodbye to a mentor, and in telling my dad it was all going to be ok and he could rest and stop fighting. It was in friends texting me, sharing bible verses, telling me they were praying for me. But most of all it was marked by a trip to Israel. The Bible says in Isaiah 55 8-9 that “His ways are Higher than ours.” And that is so true. In December of 2017 my husband and I were presented with the opportunity to buy a condo to flip and sell for a profit. We took the chance and closed on the condo on January 12th, 2018. We worked on weekends and our days off, and we did indeed sell that condo for a profit. It paid for my family of 5 to travel to Israel with our church. It incidentally also covered an unexpected sewer pipe at our home that needed to be replaced sooner than later. It was just enough for both. While the pipe was annoying, because of the condo sell we avoided having to take on the near $9,000 dollars of debt. And in a year that was the weirdest one I have had, one of the hardest, and most saddening, Israel was a flowing of the Hesed love of God. It was enough love needed to cover over the first half of the year, and though I didn’t know it at the time is was more than enough love to propel me through the 2nd half which was harder than the first. Israel gave me a tangible memory of God’s Hesed for mankind – you and me. While in Israel we visited the garden where Jesus prayed hours before his trial, judgment, and crucifixion. In that same garden where the decisions to love those who will never deserve it were made, I was given the privilege to pray over my three children with my husband.

As I sat in my chair reading this chapter this morning, God whispered, “Your year was book ended with Hesed. It was full of it all the way through.” And it was expressed in a way that I can’t explain in a garden half way around the world.

Though this year was hard, I will choose to remember it as the year that God poured out his steadfast (hesed) love over and over. While it was sad, I was sustained by the love of God.

Bible, Christmas, family activities, family fun, Holiday, Uncategorized

Advent-Make room for Jesus

November 26, 2018 No Comments

A week ago I taught at our church’s Women’s Event on Advent. I shared where and how Advent originated and how it changed over the years. I am not sure what the word Advent means to you. But to me it means making room for Jesus. We have been doing Advent “calendars” in my home for years. Well actually we have never done a traditional Advent calendar. I’ve always made my own. I guess it is more appropriate to say we have done Advent Christmas readings for years.

I have done them with my kids at Christmas for at least 8 years but I think probably longer. We started with the general Advent reading from the Book of Luke in the Bible and a few verses from Matthew. As my children grew we adapted our Advent readings to include the names of Jesus, the wonder of Jesus, and this year we will look into the gifts God gives us. I have included the scriptures we used in our boxes at the bottom of this post.

I figure since we give gifts to one another we should be familiar with the gifts that God gives us. So I began to compile a list of the gifts from God mentioned in the scriptures. And keeping with the gift theme I found little boxes on Amazon

and then embellished them with ribbons so we can hang one each night on our Advent Tree.

Our Advent Tree is just a little 3 foot tall tree I keep near our kitchen table where we usually do our Advent readings.

You could use any Advent calendar that you add your own verse to like the ones we made at our church this year!

Or you can do ornaments or whatever you like.

My kids have grown quite a bit over the years, but I still try to slow life down, sit together as a family at some point in the day, and reflect on the goodness of God. I cherish taking a small breather in a day that is filled with so much busyness; to reflect that God is the best gift giver and that God cherishes these moments of reflection and togetherness more than I do.

I want with all my heart for my kids to have a thriving, vibrant relationship with Jesus. And I want to honor Jesus in Christmas above all else. It’s funny how the time of year that is supposed to be about the birth of our Savior gets swallowed up in gifts, parties, trees, lights, cookies, and all the other Christmas festivities. But as I read in the Bible it wasn’t all that different when Jesus was born. I mean they weren’t decorating trees, and making cookies to share with the neighbors, but it was a busy time. The entire world at that time was being registered for the census ordered by Case Augustus. In those days when a Census was ordered you had to travel back to the town you were born in to be counted.

We read in Luke 2:4-6 the story of Joseph and his betrothed wife Mary traveling from Galilee to the town of Bethlehem. They traveled somewhere between 80-90 miles. For most of us traveling that far is nothing. It’s less then 2 hours in a car, no big deal. But to travel in those days was a challenge. You were on a donkey or maybe a camel or even a horse. You didn’t have room to take much with you. The road wasn’t a paved highway, but rather a dirt path to follow. After traveling for somewhere between 4-7 days, Mary goes into labor. The King Jesus is about to be born. But the world around them was buzzing with the people going to be counted. The world around Mary and Joseph hardly took notice that a king was coming to this world to redeem His people. Luke 2:7 says “And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in the swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn.” Because there was no place for them……

I wonder how many times Jesus is pushed to the side in our lives because there was no place for Him.

While we certainly should have daily time with Jesus, Christmas seems to be the time that is hardest to accomplish. There is so much to do. And Advent has become my way of daily making space for Jesus in my life and the lives of my family. My Advent tree is a visual, daily reminder to make room for the King. It reminds me that all of the fun and festivities are second to Jesus.

God wants us to have fun, celebrate ones we love, enjoy life, but never at the expense of time with Him. I encourage you to find a way that works for you; but make space, make room in your life for Him this Christmas. Take time and experience God’s greatest gift to us – the gift of knowing and having a relationship with Jesus!

Gifts of God

family activities, family fun, Parenting, Raising Teens, Thanksgiving, Uncategorized

Creating an Atmosphere of Thankfulness

October 21, 2018 No Comments

I used to think my love language was not words of affirmation. But when I think of things I have done with my kids to let them know they are special, loved, and valued it seems to always come back to giving them words of affirmation. Maybe I am more of a words of affirmation person more than I thought.

One of my biggest goals in raising my 3 kids is that they know beyond a shadow of a doubt that they are loved, valued, special and have great purpose in this world. I want them to know that is what God thinks of them, but I also want them to know that is what their father and I think of them. I look for ways to tell them this outside of just my words.

Since it is almost the end of October, I am beginning to think of the Holiday Season (who am I kidding? I’ve been thinking about this since Hobby Lobby put up their Christmas decorations in August.) Anyway, I never am really sure how to approach the holiday season. On one hand it has all the family time and heartfelt meaning to it, and on the other it has all the craziness of making it perfect, special and memorable. I want my kids to look back on the holidays and think of the love and the joy that came from those times – not the stress.

So this year I have decided to express to them why I am thankful for them as three unique individuals. I have done things like this in the past by writing on hearts why I love them and hanging them around their rooms. One time I wrote on hearts why God loves them. We have done thankful leaves, too – writing down things we are thankful for. We have even done the 1000 gifts lists – writing down as many as we can think of that we are thankful for. And all of those are great and fun family activities to do. In fact, if you haven’t done things like that, I encourage you to try it this year.

For me I wanted to personalize the gratitude this fall. I wanted them to know specific reasons why I am thankful and grateful for them. So I went to Hobby Lobby and got fake fall colored leaves. Then everyday leading up to Thanksgiving I wrote down one thing I was thankful for about them on a leaf and taped that leaf to their doors. I did this for all 3 of them being specific to them. I have one child who makes me laugh all the time. So I told him I was thankful for the times he brings me great joy. I have one who has a servants heart so I told him I was thankful for the times he served me. I have one who likes to spend time with me, so I told her that I was thankful that she wanted to spend time with me. The list went on. Each day they would wake up and find a new leaf, and some days they would find it when they came home from school. The point wasn’t when it was place on their door; it was that for a few weeks they were reminded of why they were special and that someone was thankful for them.

It is one thing to be thankful for objects like houses, weather, food; but it is another to remind someone of the attributes in them that benefit others. It’s a wonderful feeling to know someone is thankful for you as a person.

So as the season of being grateful, thankful and blessed is almost upon us, I challenge you to not just look at the things around you but the people. Tell those you love why your are grateful for them. Tell them what character traits they posses that you are thankful for. And tell them why they are a blessing to you.

Letting others know they have qualities in them that are a blessing to others, and that others are thankful for those qualities, will go farther than you can imagine in creating an atmosphere of thankfulness.

Bible, family activities, Holiday, Memorizing scripture, Uncategorized

A moment to reflect and pause

October 2, 2018 No Comments

I am not Jewish, but I do believe that the Jewish festivals and activities can teach us a lot about our own relationship with God. Now that that is out of the way, I want to share with you a Jewish celebration or maybe tradition that I started doing this year. It is called Tashlikh. Tashlikh means to cast away. The celebration of Tashlikh is done during the 10 days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. Which I realize as you read this is already past; however, I am wanting to get at the heart of this celebration not focus on its actual time frame

Since I am not Jewish I am not going to attempt to tell you how they celebrated this, but I will share how I choose to celebrate Tashlikh. I asked the ladies from my Bible study to meet me at a pond near our church. A few weeks before we met at the pond, my co-leader and I gathered some rocks for this day. We left some blank and painted on a few of them. We painted words like “faith”, “worthy”, and “loved”.

The day we met at the park I explained to them that Tashlikh is a time when we reflect on what sin or habit or item in our lives the Lord would have us give up or, to use the Tashlikh wording, cast away. I read to the ladies Micah 7:19 which says “You will again have compassion on us. You will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depth of the sea.” I told the ladies to grab a blank rock and a marker, go find a place near the pond and ask God what they needed to cast off in their lives. After they were done discussing that with the Lord, I instructed them to write it on the rock and then throw the rock into the pond. So we all took our rocks, found our place to be quiet and pray, and then write on and release our rocks.

While I was sitting talking to God about the word on my rock, He said once we release the rock into the pond we can’t get it back. It would be next to impossible to find it in the pond. And even if we could find it by the time we did the words would be faded if not completely wiped away by the water and other items in the pond like sand and dirt and other rocks. Then God said, “This is how I forgive. I get rid of it – never to be able to get it back or find it again. So why can’t you let things go?” I sat there thinking about that. Why are we so hard on ourselves? Why do we hold onto things we should just let go of? And once they are gone, why do we live as though we are still holding on to them?

One of the points of Tashlikh is using your body to represent what is happening in the spiritual realm. On my rock, I wrote self-doubt and pride. I struggle with believing I am good enough – that I have something valuable to give to those around me. Or I think I am so great everyone should align their thinking with mine all the time. I never seem to find that balance of humility and obedience. I have spent hours in prayer on this. And then it became clear. It isn’t pride to share what God tells me, and it isn’t up to me to make people accept it. That part is on God. I am called to love others and point them to Jesus with my life. The end result is up to God. Whether I am accepted or not is not the issue. It becomes an issue of obedience to Christ and trusting Him with the outcome. When we write our issue or sin or word on the rock, we are acknowledging our wrong thinking or wrong actions. When we release them, we are giving them to God and asking him to wash over them. We are living out Micah 7:19 and Psalm 103:12. God really does remove our sins, and He says He will remember them no more according to Isaiah 43:25. It’s amazing how a physical action can help us understand something we know to be true but had a hard time fully understanding.

When the ladies were done with their rocks and had thrown them into the pond we all came back together. There is a second part to Tashlikh that is just as important as the first. Once we gave God our struggle we turn and look for the positive. I told the ladies to think of something God has done for them this year. Or think of something God has helped you to overcome. Basically, now that we got rid of one word, let’s focus on a new word. For me it was “worthy”. I have worth and value because God created me and gave His son to take my place so I can have a thriving eternal relationship with Him. That screams of value and worth. I also have worth because God has created me with a purpose according to Jeremiah 29:11.

Our words were not all the same and they were not supposed to be. We are all vastly different with different struggles and different strengths. We got rid of something that was bad, but we are to keep doing something that was good. We are not supposed to live focused on our sin, but rather live giving glory to God for the good.

So I challenge you to think of something you have been holding onto or a sin you have struggled with for too long. Write it on a rock then throw it into water (somewhere) and let it go. Give to God 100%. Then think of something good you are doing or an area of weakness you are overcoming – something amazing God has done in you or through you. Write that on a rock and put it somewhere you will see it often. Remind yourself, God is faithful. He will forgive our mistakes, and He is using us to make a difference for His glory. Go and celebrate Tashlikh.

Click Here for October’s memory verse

Bible, Memorizing scripture

Obedience is best

September 20, 2018 No Comments

For anyone tracking, I am about 2 1/2 weeks behind in this post. I normally have been posting at least once a month with a monthly memory verse. Well, this month I was out of town at the beginning of September and I literally haven’t been home this month but for 5 days. While it is the middle or near end of the month, I have a great verse to share and lots that God has taught me about this verse.

For the most of the month, I was in Israel with my church and family. First off if you haven’t gone you NEED to go. It’s not scary or dangerous, but life-giving and amazing. With that out of the way, there were many things that touched my heart while in Israel, but I want to share a continual theme that kept coming up throughout the trip. God wants our hearts, and with our hearts comes our allegiance, and with our allegiance comes obedience. You see God wants to be in a relationship with you, where you surrender your ways to His and live in obedience to what He tells you to do. That may sound scary and sometimes it might be, but the outcome will be worth the risk.

One of our first stops along the way was to the town of Joppa. Joppa is the city port where Jonah tried to run away from God and got on a boat headed for Tarshish. God had asked Jonah to go to Nineveh and call out against them for their evil has caught God’s attention. (Jonah 1:1-3) But Jonah knew God and knew God would have compassion on the Ninevehites and not send wrath upon them. This was a big deal to Jonah because the Ninevehites had invaded Jonah’s land earlier in his life and quite possibly were responsible for the death of his parents. They were wicked and mean people. And Jonah didn’t want them to have any of God’s mercy. So He ran away from God. And we all know how the story goes. Jonah gets thrown overboard, swallowed by a big fish, repents in the fish’s stomach and gets thrown onto dry land. He finally goes to Nineveh and tells them God will send His wrath if they don’t repent, and the city will be overthrown. According to Jonah 3:5 the people of Nineveh repent, fast and cry out to God. Verse 10 of chapter 3 tells us that when God saw what they did, how they turned from their wicked ways, and He relented of the disaster He had for them.

Jonah still wrestled with God’s mercy over his judgement which we all do from time to time, but the point is that Jonah, after going through a lot of trouble (and a fish), decided obedience to God is best. The end result, the city was saved, even though they didn’t deserve it. Our God still saves people who don’t deserve it, and for that, we should be grateful.

The city is also home to another person in the Bible – Simon the Tanner. Peter the disciple is staying in Joppa with Simon the Tanner when Peter has the vision of food coming down from heaven. Acts 10:1-35. This story is the beginning of Peter’s ministry to the Gentiles. This place is where Peter encountered God in a vision – where God told Him that God makes all things, including all men, clean. You may be wondering why that is important. What God was telling Peter is God wants ALL MEN (and women and children) to be saved, not just those who are of Jewish heritage. Peter’s obedience to God is why I am a child of God today. God again wanted to show Himself merciful to all men, and He needed a person to do that.

Through both of these stories, God was glorified and people were saved. I don’t think that Jonah or Peter knew the impact of their obedience. I don’t think they could ever imagine the ripple effect that act would have for years to come.

Joppa is a town that reminds us that God wants to partner with us to make His name famous in all the world. We can either surrender and obey, or we can fear and try to run and hide; but God will still accomplish His will. When we try to avoid obeying God, we don’t stop His plans but rather bring ourselves, pain, frustration, and fear.

God doesn’t want what we can offer Him. He wants our hearts. Because when He has our hearts, obedience follows naturally, and God’s goodness is spread through the land.

Ok. I realize this is long, but stick with me. We are no different than Jonah or Peter. God has called everyone who believes in Him to share that faith with others. And sometimes we respond with, “But they don’t deserve it.” And sometimes we respond with, “God they could never turn their hearts over to you. They are evil or, to put it in Peter’s terms, unclean.” But God is full of mercy and His ways are higher than ours. The bible says in 2 Peter 3:9 that God wants all people to be saved and none to perish. So what is holding you back from obeying God and sharing His love with those around you? You have a choice. You can be like Jonah and go through some pretty gross things before you obey God, or you can be like Peter and wrestle it out in prayer and obey God. Which way will you choose?

Click here for September’s memory verse.

Bible, Memorizing scripture, Uncategorized

A heart that dreams

August 4, 2018 No Comments

Summer is nearly over. And for anyone tracking, I am late in posting the August memory verse. But that is how this month is going to go for me. School starts, bible study starts, sprinkle in some family bonding, and a missions opportunity, add some changes with our church, and you have the recipe for CRAZY!! Although, I could say almost every month for me is crazy. Hence live the crazy life. I am just a magnet for crazy! Take on new tasks and add more to the old – sure why not — CRAZY!. But it is fun. I laugh more than anyone, which is due in large part to my husband and kids. They just make life fun. The other thing that makes this chaos keep spinning is the fact that I am chasing after my dream. Since I was a kid I can remember asking God to make me different. I got a little more than I thought I would with that prayer, but I wouldn’t give it back now even if I could.

I wanted to bring peace to everyone everywhere. I wanted everyone I knew to feel loved and valued. I still do. I just go about it differently now than at age 5. Ok, all that long-windedness (is that a word?) to bring me to the main point of this month’s blog. Finding your purpose and living it.

Some call it their dream, their calling, their purpose. All of which means the same thing. God has us each here for a reason, and life is best when we know that reason and strive to fulfill it. But just how to find it and accomplish it seems elusive at best, and sometimes impossible.

Then I read these verses from Psalm 16. Verse 7 reads ” I bless the Lord who gives me counsel, in the night also my heart instructs me.” When I first read it all I could think of were the verses that talk about the heart being full of evil like Jer. 17:9. But this verse seemed to be saying my heart instructs me at night. Why at night I wondered? I am not a fan of the night. Sleepless, bad dreams, loneliness all seem to thrive in the night. Anyway, I did a little research and the word heart there is actually kidney. Odd – my kidney instructs me at night… all mine instructs me to do is use the bathroom at 2:00AM. That isn’t what it means. It does mean kidney, but there is more to it than that. It also means the seat of emotions or your innermost heartfelt desires. The secret things you long for that you don’t tell just anyone. An amazing woman of God and friend of mine told me that the kidney is one of our innermost organs, and damage to a kidney can be life threating. It all began to connect and lead me to this amazing conclusion. God gives us counsel or direction but allows our dreams or our God-given purpose to instruct us. Why do I say dreams, because at night you dream, and if we pay attention to those weird dreams they might just be clues to our purpose. You see God gives us certain desires, or likes if you will, to specific things. For me, I love the word of God, art, and talking. Mix it all together and you have Bible study leader who makes art to decorate the table for the study. Or a leader who is always making stuff for the women in the study that have Bible verses on them so they can take them with them or hang them up at work or home to remind them what God says. I even put Bible verses on the little tags that connect to a bag of tea. Make something portable, pretty and full of the word of God and I am in every time!

But that’s me. So what is you? Do you like to write? Start a blog or write a Bible study, or even just write a friend a note to encourage them. Do you sing? Join the worship team, make a youtube channel of your songs, or sing to random people to cheer them up. I would so do that if I could sing well. Do you cook? Join the ministry at church that makes meals for people who are going through a crisis or hard time. Do you like one on one conversation? Have people over for coffee or meet at your local Starbucks and just listen. God can use anything we offer. And it works best when we allow Him to use what fuels us.

It’s simple to figure out. Daydream for a minute what you would do if you had time on your hands. Write down what that is. Now pray over that paper and ask God to show how He wants to use that to bless you and influence those around you. Then, here is the part that trips us up every time, do what God shows/tells you to do with what is written on that paper. Then keep doing it. And bam you are living out your dream or your purpose. God has counselled you, and your heart has instructed you. And if you are really brave, tell us all about it in the comment section of this blog.

Click here for the August memory verse

Recipes

Gluten Free Cherry Ginger Coffee Cake

July 28, 2018 No Comments

This recipe was created to use up some ingredients I had in my refrigerator – sour cream and cherry curd. Odd, I know, but I knew I needed to use them both. I also knew I had made a great tasting sour cream coffee cake before. I decided why not spice up the original bundt cake with cherry curd and a little fresh ginger and make it gluten-free so I can give it to my mom for her birthday. So I set out to do just that.

I did make a regular gluten-full one for my family and then made 4 mini gluten-free bundt cakes – three for my mom, and I kept one for me. The recipe is fairly basic and easily adjustable.

You start with butter and sugar and cream those together. ( Sorry Paleo friends this does have sugar. It was for a birthday cake after all, so I figured a little sugar to celebrate.) If you are a super adventurous cook and want to try to make this paleo using maple syrup and almond or coconut flour, let me know how it turns out. I was not that adventurous today.

Ok so you cream the sugar and butter together until it looks like this:

Then you mix in the vanilla and eggs one egg at a time. Once that is all mixed up, you add the baking soda, baking powder, and mix it a little. Then add one cup of flour and mix it in. Now add 1/4 cup sour cream and mix again. Then add the other cup of flour (mix again) and 2/3 more cups sour cream and mix. Lastly, add 1 tsp fresh grated ginger. Once that is all mixed up you spray your bundt pan with non-stick cooking spray and sprinkle in the cinnamon and brown sugar. Then pour half the batter over the brown sugar and cinnamon mixture and top with the cherry curd. I did make my own cherry curd about a week before this to a make these amazing little tarts. I found the recipe on Pinterest. Back to the cherry curd. I didn’t measure it, I just spooned some in the pan all the way around. It looked like this: Then you top it with the rest of the batter and sprinkle on a little more of the brown sugar and cinnamon mixture. The little bundt cakes cooked for 27 mins and the big one for 45, both at a 350-degree oven.

I let them cool – probably not long enough because when I got them out of the pan, some cake stuck to the bundt pan. I ate some of it and the bigger pieces I pushed back into their place. I am not a professional baker so I am more about taste than looks. See what I mean. One looks great the other not so great, but both taste awesome!

Here is the full recipe:

1 1/2 cups butter softened

3/4 cup sugar

2 eggs

2 cups flour (regular or gluten-free)

1 tsp baking soda

1 tsp baking powder

3/4 cup sour cream

1/2-1 tsp fresh grated ginger

cherry curd

1/3 cup brown sugar for topping mixed with 2 tsp cinnamon

Directions:

Beat butter and white sugar together until well mixed. Add eggs one at a time and vanilla. Mix in baking powder and baking soda. Then alternate sour cream and flour mixing until well combined. Add grated ginger and mix once more. Spray bundt pans with non-stick cooking spray. Sprinkle in brown sugar and cinnamon mixture. Pour 1/2 cake batter into pan (for mini bundt pans pour 1/8 of batter per mini bundt pan). Spoon cherry curd over batter. Sprinkle in more of the brown sugar cinnamon mixture and then the rest of the batter on top of the cherry curd. Now sprinkle in the rest of the brown sugar cinnamon mixture and bake at 350. For one large bundt cake cook for 45 mins. For four small mini bundt cakes cook for 27 mins. Let cake cool before removing from the pan.

Here is the one for my mom’s birthday all wrapped and ready to give to her:

love, Memorizing scripture, Uncategorized

Weighed Down in Love

July 5, 2018 1 Comment

I have been wrestling with what to write for this month. I felt like I should be patriotic and write about praying for your nation. Then I had a different issue on my heart but finally felt the Lord lead to this while I was reading my devotional book this morning. The devotion is by Beni Johnson from Spiritual Java. The title was “Calling Forth His Desires”. In it, she writes, “Often people ask me to pray for them, they come with an agenda or an idea of what they want to ask God to do.” She goes on to say, “We need to learn to listen to the heartbeat of God and not always present our ideas to Him as if they are demands. It’s not about whether agendas are right or wrong, but it’s about spending time with God and resting in His presence. The amazing thing to me is that God is waiting for us to enter into Him.”

Bam, it hit me. I have been meditating on a verse that I would like to make this month’s memory verse. Isaiah 30:18. “Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore He exalts Himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is the God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for Him.”

This verse speaks of an intimate encounter with Jesus. It portrays God standing, waiting with open arms to pour out His love and mercy. It’s as if He is standing there with so much love, mercy, and compassion that He is bending under the weight of it and simply cannot wait to lavish it upon us. He only needs us to turn our attention towards Him and ask, “What do you have for me in this situation?”

I’m not sure about you, but that isn’t the picture I have in my mind when I pray. I often feel like I have to say the right thing, ask in the right way, and then wait for what seems like forever before I get an answer. And I know God has timing, and it often involves us waiting, but I never think of God waiting on me. Waiting to pour out His love on me. Waiting to show His justice in my situation.

That is an amazing thought to me; that God is waiting to pour out mercy and love, compassion and justice. What an amazing God. So the next time you pray, before you say a word, close your eyes and see if you can picture God standing there waiting with His arms so full of love that it literally is weighing him down. He is there waiting to pour that love over you, to send justice in your situations, to hold you in compassion when you are hurting. He is waiting for you.

Click Here for July’s Memory Verse

Memorizing scripture, patience, Steadfast love, Uncategorized

The Necessary Unnecessary path

June 4, 2018 No Comments

God never ceases to amaze me. This month’s memory verse is one of those that you have to ponder on. If you allow the depth of truth hidden in this verse to be revealed, it will surely amaze you! Do you ever feel like sometimes God is saying two opposing things at the same time? This is one of those. Are you ready to be amazed?

2 Thessalonians 3:5 reads, “May the Lord direct your heart to the love of God and to the steadfastness of Christ.” A heart-warming good-to-pray verse. Who doesn’t want their heart directed to the love of God and the steadfastness of Christ? This is one of those verses you could write in a birthday or graduation card. One that makes everyone feel good. And this is indeed a good thing to pray for yourself and others. But there is a great understanding that might change how you pray this verse.

To start, the words “direct your heart”. That “direct” word is kateuthunó, and it means “go straight down by the most direct, efficient route; to go in a direct course – avoiding all unnecessary delays, without any undue loss of time or achievement”. Ok, that makes perfect sense. I have to point out that I just love the “avoiding all unnecessary delays” part. But here comes the weird part of this verse. The word steadfastness isn’t the steadfast love concept I have been writing about this year. It has a different meaning. The word steadfastness is hupomoné and it means “remaining under, endurance; steadfastness, especially as God enables the believer to “remain (endure) under” the challenges He allots in life”. And there you have it. This verse is asking for our hearts to be directed to God’s love in the straightest path possible without unnecessary delays, and then ends the verse that on our way to God’s love we would go through the endurance to remain in hard places that God allows through Christ’s steadfastness. Those seem like opposites to me. A direct path with no delays to a place of remaining under trials? What?

I am reading this devotional book called Amazed and Confused by Heather Zempel. She does a great job explaining this concept. “Sometimes the best thing to propel us towards Jesus is the desperate determination: that potent combination of certain dispairs in your circumstances and humble confidence in Christ that draws His heart to you.” (page 41) Or I would say draws your heart towards His.

Think about it. God wants every man, woman, and child’s heart to turn toward Him – to seek Him, to want Him and Him only. Sometimes the only way to do that is to allow “trials” in our lives that bring us to a place where the only way to get through them is with the steadfastness of Christ. Maybe just maybe those hard, sometimes impossible to overcome on our own bumps in the road, are the straightest path for us to find Christ to help leads to the father’s heart.

It’s amazing, isn’t it? That God loves us so much that He would direct our hearts to places that are necessary to find Jesus even if we think they were completely unnecessary. It’s a love that leads only to what we need and stirs us – if we let it – away from things that are unnecessary in the process. The key is an open heart and a willing obedience to go where He leads and trust Him to give us the endurance to make it through the rough places to find Him.

The next time you are going through one of those hard places, ask God to open your eyes to the steadfastness of Jesus so you can know His love deeper in the end. Ask Him to lead you, and pray He will show you what you once saw as completely unnecessary you would see as necessary to know His love.

Click Here for June’s Memory Verse.

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